atthequillsmercy: (Default)
Ma has been in the hospital since Wednesday and with her having lung cancer and all, I always wonder if this time will be the time she goes in and never comes out. But it isn't this time. Ma's being treated for shingles and will be home in a couple days. Not fit as a fiddle but fit enough.

It's during times like this where I try to meet my writing goals but I tend to fall short. I am filled with guilt about focusing on anything else but my Mother getting better and also for not giving my writing the focus it deserves. But through all this, I noticed that writing helped me keep my head together during down time where I would otherwise be panicking. I'm the type to handle a crisis while its happening then break down after (or when there's really nothing more I can do).

Writing really helped me keep from curling up in a ball and crying or screaming at people for no reason other than they continue to breathe near me. So now I know in the future, I shouldn't feel guilty for writing if something has gone bad or if I can't reach the magical 5 page mark. If the treadmill and weights keep my body strong, writing keeps my spirit strong. I'll need both to support my family through though times.

Now, since things are better, I promise I will get back to talking about anime and making dick, fart, and boob jokes now. XD
atthequillsmercy: (Default)
Isn't is always the way when circumstances arise that you get a break from your kids you just turn around and miss the hell outta them instead of getting any real work done? Ah well... :/

I always have to think about juggling time with my daughter and time to write or draw. These days, it's been a matter of sacrificing the regular updates which isn't such a bad thing. I'd rather not have the whole story on the site anymore but fill the side with short fiction, most of which hasn't been written yet. My foolproof list so far for finding ways to keep working has so far been:

1: Make that time sacred. Almost like a ritual. Every night, kiddo gets a story, I get a bit of workout time and a shower (limit of 30 minutes on the workouts), then I settle in with my pen and a notebook for an hour. No matter what. Any more than that is gratis.

2: Be easy on yourself. Not every day is gonna be perfect. Beds will be wet, nightmares will be had, creative juices won't flow and you'll spend that hour staring at the wall instead of creating.

The most important?
3: Anything counts. Journal entries, ideas, quotes, even blog posts. It all contributes to the greater good: Honing your craft and sharpening your ability. Every single word counts.

So go out there, write a poetic shopping list, quote your favorite gum commercial, just write and write anything you can. Eventually, you'll have everything you need.

SLUMP!!

Jun. 30th, 2010 03:09 am
atthequillsmercy: (Lenore)
I'm having one of those spells where I spend more time staring at the wall than writing. I crank out a couple choice sentences and then nada.

I'm sure my inspiration will strike at a completely inopportune time. Until then, I suppose I'll keep editing and typing up what I've written. Somehow, typing up what I've written always shakes something loose.

And don't ask me how the website is coming along. I'll get there. :p
atthequillsmercy: (Batshit genius)
I have declared to myself that if I can complete 20 pages of writing before Saturday, I will spend Saturday doing some sketching. My kiddo will be out most of the day so it'll be easy for me to settle down with my sketchbook and see what comes out of it.

Fingers crossed? Most certainly. ;)

I have 2 pages done so far...

Yay?
atthequillsmercy: (Default)
My weekend of fun was indeed much fun but not so much in the way of work really got done. XD Me and my friend had out own private wine tasting in our awesome room. While we enjoyed some of the fine (and not so fine) wines that Long Island has to offer, we ate cheese and Triscuts, she watched the last season of True Blood and I did more wine enjoying that writing. I even have a very proud wine stain on the page where I believe I completed an entire sentence. :p

This is also the first time I've really been near entire episodes of True Blood. It was season two and I really have to wonder when they have time to shove in a plot between all the sex they were having! I overheard more sex in those few episodes than I really believe I've had in my entire life. Ever. One MUST believe a vagina just gets tired, ya know?

Anyway, I returned home to the same child who didn't miss me at all and frankly barely cared I was gone. 9_9 So, I was easily able to make up a page or so after I got back since she wanted nothing to do with me. I have been told this is a phase but still, hearing her say "I don't like you. Go away! I don't want you!" is very much akin to being stabbed in the heart. I did warn her that she shouldn't say such things to her mother so close to her birthday but toddler rage is swift and absolute.

The worst thing about trying to fit my creativity in around what little time I have with my daughter was having to hear that she hates my writing. You may be surprised at how profound a near three year old can be. She hates my writing because she rather me spend time with her. The flip side is how she does treat me when she has all my attention (see above paragraph). Now, I would love, love, LOVE to involve her with my writing or just have her head on one knee and my notebook on the other. But I don't get work done. She fidgets, demands water, or insists I write her name all over the page. History will be very intrigued by scans of my original manuscripts, let me tell ya. XD

Since her birthday is next week, I have taken several days off from Day Job and will try to sneak in a page or two while she refuses to be interrupted during Sesame Street. Yes, my kid watches TV. That may be part of why she has such an amazing vocabulary and makes up these wild stories. 0.0 Then again, she may indeed be her mother's daughter. ;)

On that poor parenting note: Off to writing and perhaps a little sketching. We'll see.
atthequillsmercy: (Default)
There is just a point where you give it up. You're staring at the page, wondering where those last two hours went and why the paper hates you so very much. This occurred last night. Sometimes you really have to just accept the writer's block and call it a night before you kill someone in frustration.

I'll admit it, I had a short temper with a certain little girl who refused to sleep in a very reasonable expression of toddler behavior. Blocked creativity can do that to a lady. I'm doing better today but honestly, there are just times where I have to tell my daily word goal to "suck it," and do whatever I can.

For lunch today: Salad with lemon juice and olive oil. You're gonna get these updates till the snarkiness is out of my system. This could take awhile. ;)
atthequillsmercy: (Default)
I finished episode one of "Djinn" tonight! I've been really pleased with my progress these days. The words just keep coming and they're pretty good even pre-editing! :D 

Tomorrow, I will be updating on schedule after I make sure there aren't any glaring typos. Then I'll be looking at layouts to see if I can get something a little cleaner and more "author like." No offense to my awesome pink and purple swirl but pink on black wears on the eyes after awhile. And I spend a lot of time staring at computer screens, I know what I'm sayin here.

One of the awesome things about having a day job in addition to writing is the library will send me to places like Book Expo. There were publishers, authors, and exhibitors, oh my! I came back with so much swag, there are bruises from where the bag cut into my shoulder. I'm still going through it all but I have some great information on marketing websites and connecting with other writers who are on the same route I'm taking. I gotta say, the thought of having some other authors here and reading my stuff is kinda awesome. Unless they tell me I suck, then not so much.

Since my representation has told me Dreamhunter will be available to order in the next week or so, I'll be removing the chapters and putting up a preview instead. It's this that's got me wondering about other site layouts, ya dig?

I got a little more work to do before I pack it in for the night (and my hands are starting to get mad at me for the typing) so, off I go. Till tomorrow, kids!
atthequillsmercy: (Batshit genius)
I'm changing my update schedule. Here's why.

I was sent this by a good friend of mine (name withheld till I know it's cool with her to mention it) and it got me thinking a couple things:

One: Ha! Perhaps I'm in the wrong genre and I should start churning out massive amounts of erotica. That'll be interesting to explain to my mother now and my kid later. XD

Two: Since I have so many ideas in my head and I want my site to be a success, I want to make sure it's the best stuff possible. No more discovering typos after the fact. Well, that's probably gonna happen anyway but lest often now. XD I want the updates to be longer ad more detailed so I'm changing the updates to every other week unless I get pretty darn ambitious. I want the site to be as professional as a snarky bitch like me can get it. Do I need to be as popular as Zane ever? Not particularly. Couldn't hurt. ;) But let's not count chickens, yes?

I'll do a better job of keeping this journal updated as well. But for now, I'm off to write! Latahz!
atthequillsmercy: (FAIL)
I respect you. Revere you. Heck, I even worship you. So you know it's with no disrespect when I say, it's' MAY! What the fucking hell?!?!

Your semi-obedient daughter,
Lenni

On the writing front, tonight I'm typing and hoping I get enough done to update this Friday. My creativity has been a bit schitzo lately. Probably the tiredness from the equally schitzo weather. T_T But I shall push though it and get as much done as physically possible. This means I won't be slavishly updating the facebook and twitter pages like a nut and hunting for responses. I've wasted so much time doing that. 9_9 I know networking is important but having a product worth networking FOR is much more important.

Of course

May. 2nd, 2010 04:04 pm
atthequillsmercy: (Default)
I forget to update the journal that I updated the website. Good job, Lenni. :p Anyways, "Djinn" has been cleaned up and updated. I am working on that at a pretty good pace, along with my contest entry, and a couple of side projects I'm working on. As you can see, I've changed my avatar to a beautiful portrait that [livejournal.com profile] nocturnian created for me. I look exactly like that... All the time... Honest. ;) You can check out her work here. You won't be sorry.

And back to work for me! I'm already a page into my word goal for the day. ;)

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