atthequillsmercy: (FAIL)
I'm off till Thursday for the combination of my daughter's birthday and Litha (Summer Solstice). I spend ALL DAY yesterday doing laundry so I wouldn't have to spend my entire vacation doing it and could maybe get caught up on my writing. Funny thing: I get more writing done when I have to go to work than when I'm home all day. It's just too much distraction chasing my daughter around all day and finding ways to keep her entertained.

And I'm thinking of having another kid?! I must be out of my mind!!!

Anyways, today's plan is to accompany my mother to the doctor. Depending on when we get out, I may take the kid to the park or just go home and write while she naps. I have no idea. @_@ Watch, I'll end up cleaning the floors instead of writing. >_<
atthequillsmercy: (Default)
Isn't is always the way when circumstances arise that you get a break from your kids you just turn around and miss the hell outta them instead of getting any real work done? Ah well... :/

I always have to think about juggling time with my daughter and time to write or draw. These days, it's been a matter of sacrificing the regular updates which isn't such a bad thing. I'd rather not have the whole story on the site anymore but fill the side with short fiction, most of which hasn't been written yet. My foolproof list so far for finding ways to keep working has so far been:

1: Make that time sacred. Almost like a ritual. Every night, kiddo gets a story, I get a bit of workout time and a shower (limit of 30 minutes on the workouts), then I settle in with my pen and a notebook for an hour. No matter what. Any more than that is gratis.

2: Be easy on yourself. Not every day is gonna be perfect. Beds will be wet, nightmares will be had, creative juices won't flow and you'll spend that hour staring at the wall instead of creating.

The most important?
3: Anything counts. Journal entries, ideas, quotes, even blog posts. It all contributes to the greater good: Honing your craft and sharpening your ability. Every single word counts.

So go out there, write a poetic shopping list, quote your favorite gum commercial, just write and write anything you can. Eventually, you'll have everything you need.
atthequillsmercy: (Boot)
I really need to stop thinking that having a day off will allow me to get more writing done. 9_9 If anything, the reverse is true. If I'm at Dayjob, I'm able to write on my breaks. If I'm at home, there are no breaks. In fact, the moment I decide to pick up a pen because Monkey-girl has her attentions elsewhere, Mommy is suddenly a hot commodity and life cannot go on without my complete and utter attention to what she's doing. Sweet? Of course. But not writer friendly.

So, it's back to the tried and true method of cramming as many words as possible in between her bedtime and mine. I'll still be taking my goal down to 500 a day so I feel less horrid about myself. 9_9

On the upside, me and the child have never been closer. ;) That may not get Greenhouse done as fast as I'd like, but a better goal in the long run. ^_^
atthequillsmercy: (Magic)
On this Mommy Monday, I really must give a shout out to all the people who make it possible for this Mommy to get things done. Without them, the site wouldn't get built, stories would never get written, and my imagination would never be able to run wild and free to cause chaos in it's wake. Nobody is an island and without them, I'd be lost.

A huge thank you to all of you. You keep me as sane as necessary. ;)
atthequillsmercy: (High Energy Magic Use Area)
This Mommy Monday, just a quick note to wish a happy third birthday to my monkeygirl. Time flies, doesn't it?

And a blessed Solstice to everyone!! :D
atthequillsmercy: (Default)
My weekend of fun was indeed much fun but not so much in the way of work really got done. XD Me and my friend had out own private wine tasting in our awesome room. While we enjoyed some of the fine (and not so fine) wines that Long Island has to offer, we ate cheese and Triscuts, she watched the last season of True Blood and I did more wine enjoying that writing. I even have a very proud wine stain on the page where I believe I completed an entire sentence. :p

This is also the first time I've really been near entire episodes of True Blood. It was season two and I really have to wonder when they have time to shove in a plot between all the sex they were having! I overheard more sex in those few episodes than I really believe I've had in my entire life. Ever. One MUST believe a vagina just gets tired, ya know?

Anyway, I returned home to the same child who didn't miss me at all and frankly barely cared I was gone. 9_9 So, I was easily able to make up a page or so after I got back since she wanted nothing to do with me. I have been told this is a phase but still, hearing her say "I don't like you. Go away! I don't want you!" is very much akin to being stabbed in the heart. I did warn her that she shouldn't say such things to her mother so close to her birthday but toddler rage is swift and absolute.

The worst thing about trying to fit my creativity in around what little time I have with my daughter was having to hear that she hates my writing. You may be surprised at how profound a near three year old can be. She hates my writing because she rather me spend time with her. The flip side is how she does treat me when she has all my attention (see above paragraph). Now, I would love, love, LOVE to involve her with my writing or just have her head on one knee and my notebook on the other. But I don't get work done. She fidgets, demands water, or insists I write her name all over the page. History will be very intrigued by scans of my original manuscripts, let me tell ya. XD

Since her birthday is next week, I have taken several days off from Day Job and will try to sneak in a page or two while she refuses to be interrupted during Sesame Street. Yes, my kid watches TV. That may be part of why she has such an amazing vocabulary and makes up these wild stories. 0.0 Then again, she may indeed be her mother's daughter. ;)

On that poor parenting note: Off to writing and perhaps a little sketching. We'll see.
atthequillsmercy: (Default)
Who indeed!

I plan to watch that documentary tonight and reading the promos and looking at books along the same lines and it's got me thinking: I don't see much on women who have kids, work full time, and THEN try to cram their creative outlets in any spare few seconds they can find. Not that I'm the type to go scraping at new frontiers or look down on stay at home moms who try and fit their art in around their kids, but working full time with kids AND striving to keep your creative fire is an entirely different kettle of fish.

Who who the hell do I think I am? Ballz out, I want to say, "Whoever the fuck I want, bitchez!" Ahhh, if only life were that simple. First off, I LOVE my job. I don't want to quit. In fact, the thought of quitting my job to pursue my dream is shooting myself in the foot. Librarianship is PART of my dream. It helps me be who I am as much as writing and drawing so why the heck would I give it up? And d00d, all the books I can get my grubby little hands on for FREE! I'd be stupid to give this up. Second, I don't DO stay at home mom. I practically went batshit crazy on maternity leave and that was even with the hope of going back to work. You think the Lenni is crazy NOW, she'd be Yellow Wallpaper crazy under the yoke of housewifery. Other women can do it, I can't. I like having a career. It makes me feel independent and useful.

I get a LOT of questions from other women in my life asking me how I was able to complete a novel, start another one, write a bevy of short stories, keep a full time job, have a side business, draw, and all the while being around the kid enough for her to still remember what I look like. And I have no idea. To try and figure that out (and as a cheap gimmick to pry more blog posts out of me) I'm starting Mommy Monday. The lovely trials and tribulations of how the bloody hell I manage all this with out being on mood elevators or booze.

There are many times in my life where I really just sit and wonder if there are any other women like me who not only have a Third Shift; but a fourth or quite possibly a fifth. If you find any, point them the way here. I'd certainly love to know who they are.

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July 2011

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